Doting Dads are Hot

Do you ever see a dad playing with his child and think, “Wow, that guy is hot.”

I woke up in a confused state after a few extra hours of blissful slumber this morning. 10:21 a.m….seriously? Then I remember my husband told me (while I was ¾ still asleep) that he was taking off with our daughter to visit his brothers’ family. I couldn’t help but feel so appreciative for this small act. I woke up at my own pace. Waking up without an alarm clock feels heavenly. I pondered what to do with  just myself, and I think “Grocery shopping kid-free? Yes!”  (Oh, what makes a mama happy, huh?). I even had time to sit, eat a muffin, and drink coffee while perusing the store ads before shopping.

While I was sitting there making my list, a man sits down at the table next to me with his two beautiful red-headed daughters. They were the true definition of “gingers.” They were adorable. I was in such a refreshed, Energizer Bunny state that I struck up a conversation with him. “How old are they?,” I ask. He responds, “Three and one-and-a-half.” We then proceed to have a ten minute conversation as they nibble on their sprinkled donuts and squeal, “Daddy!” repeatedly and innocently giggle. It was obvious they adored him. It warmed my heart, and for that moment I wished I was a photographer, as I had the perfect candid moment to snap…a loving father taking his two young daughters out for donuts on a wonderfully lazy Sunday morning. It made me think…”Doting dads like these are hot.”

What I have defined as “hot” in a man has changed over the years. While I used to put high value on his height, hair, or teeth, I now give him higher marks based on excellent diaper changing skills, his techniques with soothing a crying baby, and his ability to ignite belly laughter. Domesticity has never been more attractive.

Who needs a candle lit dinner or flowers? Just make our baby laugh, and I’m all yours 🙂

Doting dads are hot…

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Living in a small world isn’t so bad after all

As my daughter babbles and rolls around playfully on the floor, husband naps on the couch, and dog lies at my feet, I sit here pondering my life before motherhood.  It was a good life then too.  I spent my days working, hanging out with friends and family, occasionally taking road trips, shopping, eating/drinking at different restaurants, and enjoying coffee dates with close friends.  I still love doing all of the above.

When babe made her entrance into the world, I did not fully comprehend how life would change.  Did I foresee having less spare time? Yes. Did I hear about sleep deprivation? Of course. But it was subtle things I did not hear much about that I once took for granted. I now appreciate the opportunity to have a warm meal (even luke warm is sufficient), and if I can have both hands free to eat it, then that’s a bonus. As for preparing for the day ahead, I now plan to have an extra shirt set aside in the morning because I have learned that hastily cleaning up spit-up with a wet cloth while I’m trying to run out of the house just doesn’t take the odor out! In the early mommy days, when babe clung to me like a leach, sneaking away for a warm shower was a luxury as well; but now that she is growing and exploring, she’s able to entertain herself for longer periods.

In return for the quick showers, cold meals, and soiled shirts, I have gained much more. Violet brings such joy to my life…hearing high pitched squeals of delight when our dog licks her face….the deep belly laughs when I tickle her tummy…how she looks around for me when she hears my voice…how she stares up at the blowing leaves above her while we are taking a walk…how she insists on holding the spoon when being fed (stubborn like her Daddy)…

One of my ex boyfriends (and perhaps this is why he is an ex), once told me, “You live in a really small world.” To him, my dream of having a comfortable home with husband and kids sounded boring and cliché. While he envisioned his filled with worldly travels or diligently trying to find a cure for AIDs, I envisioned mine being in a place filled with peace and comfort…a happy healthy baby to nurture and to watch grow and learn…a sensitive husband whose values matched my own…faith, family, and love.  So perhaps I do live “in a small world,” but this tiny little world I live in is pretty great; because after all, it’s jammed packed with people I adore.

 

Through Violet Eyes

An epiphany moment happened just the other day. While Violet stared up at me with those sea blue eyes and smiled, I literally saw my reflection in them. It made me really think of what kind of mother I aspire to be.

I have learned:

Patience truly is a virtue. With the fast paced world we live in, it is so easy to become accustomed to a instantaneous things (high speed internet, fast-food drive through), that we forget to appreciate the simple joys. Life in the slow lane is where I want to be—enjoying the small stuff— my baby’s giggles, a perfectly made cup of coffee, or a wonderful night’s sleep. I will strive to be more patient and prosper in the slow lane.

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Although I always have prided myself in being a good listener, I have realized that with a full plate (full time work, mother, friend, etc), that my mind is not always completely set on what’s being said to me. I need to be cognizant of this, pause, and take it all in. My husband has brought this to my attention more lately. I will strive to be a better listener.

There is goodness all around us. On a lazy Sunday morning ,while in the drive-thru lane at Caribou coffee, the person ahead of me paid for my (and my sister’s) coffee. This small random act of kindness inspired me immensely. It made me realize how generous and thoughtful people can be, despite being perfect strangers. I will strive do more random acts of kindness.

Some people may not be nice at times, but before I immediately judge them for their less than A-game attitudes, I must remind myself that “everyone is fighting some kind of battle.” Maybe she just lost a loved one, is going through a divorce, or suffering from a chronic illness. Although it does not excuse blatant disrespect, it does offer some perspective. I will strive to be more compassionate and understanding.

Through Violet eyes, I will strive.